Déjà vu

I’m Having Déjà vu…

These past couple weeks have been wonderful, but a whirl wind – I love it & I “strongly dislike it" (my mom always corrected us as kids if we said we hated something – “Hate is a strong word, my darlings. You mean strongly dislike.” Funny little lady, but a wise one)...

When I say I love it, I truly mean it. I am so thankful to have had numerous visitors, a fresh area to experience new and exciting places, as well as time to see friends and family along the east coast. These are all gifts that are meant for good and to bring joy to your heart! But, sometimes I just get so caught up in the hustle 'n bustle of life.

Busy-ness is often the enemy… he loves to occupy our minds with things of this world, making sure we don’t slow down to take in each moment. To stop and thank God for His blessings, living each day with intentionality – living life with purpose… living life on purpose (friends, take a minute to sign up for Lara Casey's monthly newsletter - her letter from this past month with details on #IntentionalAugust was wonderful – sign yourself up). We spend so much time rushing from task to task, & we often forget to recognize some of the most important moments that make up our day, constantly looking for ways we can be more efficient in order to get ahead.

Last week we were giving our prayer requests in my small group (the fact that I have found a small group is an answered prayer, yay Jesus), and mine was that I would learn to balance my schedule in a healthy way. That I would be able to do the things necessary for me, both spiritually & physically, to stay healthy. I’m very much a creature of habit – I love a routine. In college (just three months ago – ha. I feel like I am saying “back in the old days” : ), I had it down to a tee, and the moment I cherished most was the morning hours of quiet time: Jesus, coffee, music. It was the best, and exactly what I needed to keep puttin’ along.

Well, there’s been a shift. I’m working now & I have spent the summer time adjusting… trying to figure out what works best when trying to balance all of my to-do’s. It’s taken a lot of experimenting, learning whether or not to say yes or no, as well as breaking away from the habit of "people pleasing". You’re probably thinking, Meredith, come on sister. You’ve been in NC for three months… get your act together already! I know, I feel ya… but, that’s why this is a work in progress – I need His help, because I’ve done it the other way, and I failed time & time again…

If I’m not careful, I have the tendency to become overwhelmed easily when faced with a big list of “stuff” (can you tell I’m a list girl?). And it’s not a trait I like. It’s not attractive to be around someone like that… (e.g. last weekend getting stuck in traffic and lost on the way up to New Jersey – sorry you had to be the one stuck in the car with me, Mom. I love you!)

Like I said, I’m having déjà vu. Hello, Meredith McKinney of Fall semester Junior year. I was no fun, overwhelmed, stressed, busy… I knew the answer was Jesus – He was my way to peace & a sound mind, but I felt I didn’t even have the time to do what I knew I needed to make the time to do. It was ugly, but the Lord yanked me out of that. He heard my hearts cry that I needed something more.

I will never forget the weekend that changed my heart forever, realigning my perspectives, and bringing me back to what truly matters. It was November of my fall semester Junior year. Without even a moment  of extra time (or so I thought) I decided to go on my church’s college weekend retreat – my head said no, but my heart screamed yes. I didn’t know how deeply I needed that weekend of rest, but God did... That weekend, there was a message given by Tim Mannin titled “Busy Life”. I felt that every word that flowed from his mouth was directed right at me, my heart, & everything I was wrestling with.

“Where is your spiritual tank?” – empty

“Do you see a connection between the amount of “noise” in your life and the connection you currently have with God?” – maybe… okay, absolutely

Pastor Tim went on to illustrate that there is a God that loves us so deeply, and there is an enemy that has come to kill, steal, & destroy. The enemy will often use the busy tasks of daily life to prevent us from experiencing a life of true joy through seeking Christ first – to the point that we feel as if we are “too busy for God”. (side note: I hate to say it, but those exact words had come out of my mouth the week before. I’m telling you, this was exactly what the Lord wanted me to hear that weekend.) He finished the message by slowly praying the words from Psalm 23:1-3 over us…

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures.
 He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul.
 He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 

// Psalm 23:1–3

Those words grabbed my heart, and I knew that the only way to supernatural peace & rest was not through first accomplishing my list of to-do’s, and then making the time I had left for God, but it was making time for God at the start, providing Him my first, and creating the space needed for Him to move in and multiply my time for my needs, according to His will.

The Lord is calling me (again) to create space, turn down the noise, & to know that He is God.

In two short days, I will be getting on a plane to fly home to Oklahoma (also known as the greatest state in the U.S., I’m almost positive it’s fact ; ) I want to make sure to be intentional with that time that I will have with those people I love so dearly. I want to take time to rest – both physically & spiritually. I want to healthily get things done, be smart with my available time, all while taking the necessary time to stop, rest, & know…

I love when my brother says the prayer before meals, because he always includes the simplest sentence, yet the statement is so profound:

“Lord, please slow this time down for us.”

Yes, Lord… do just that, please. Help us to enjoy life from moment to moment. Help me to see Your beauty in the smallest of details, to take full advantage of each opportunity you place in front of me – that I will be able to see with your eyes the vision you want me to see. Seeing this world through your lens, not viewing You through the perspective of this world.

big hugs...

See you all soon,

Mere

P.s. this song has been on replay for me lately – it's a good one. Precious words. Take a moment to listen, if you'd like : )